A friend said the other day that she is not sure that it is true about all of the affairs that people say happen at work. It would be nice if it wasn’t true, but in reality only a small handful get caught!
Often the only thing stopping us from forgiving our spouse is the shame and trust factor. To be positive, this affair that has occurred is your chance to address the issues and improve the marriage. Only you have to deal with the affair so only listen to your inner heart – not your friends. Accept that your mind is going to be going crazy for a while and go with this craziness
- What if it happens again?
- What if there have been more?
- Would I have been told if I didn’t find out?
If you can forgive you will probably need professional help to deal with your mind and your partner needs to be supportive. Just like your partner was not perfect and had an affair – you might not deal with the affair perfectly!
When our partners have affairs at least we know and there is no hiding now. Wouldn’t it be worse to still be in the secretive phase?
It is a betrayal of trust at every level, but mostly it is about the other person and how they have lost your trust and they have to show you they can be trusted again.
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